Thursday, January 15, 2009

it seems i've stepped over lines you've drawn again and again

Earlier today I was on the verge of eruption of my thoughts. I felt the lava boiling all day, and for some reason I decided to not blog. I haven't been able to in so long and without blogs my life comes to a complete halt and then I plateau with a whole week of misery and embarrassing events. Aside from walking into the wrong chapter room in the middle of their meeting, falling on snow when I was walking with my friend and having my stomach make the hugest gurgle in the middle of Writing History, I'd say I had a bad week. I'm not sure how much work they expect us to complete in one week but if this is how the rest of the semester is going to go...well then, I'm fucked.
Today was just a juxtaposition of horrible and terrible. Ok I'm so dramatic. But my day consisted of waking up at 6 (for some reason, I'm not sure), not showering but spending that whole hour flipping the tv between Fairly Odd Parents and the new all while praying that Duquesne would have some ounce of kindness and give me a two hour delay. But of course Duquesne as an institution are tyrants and they feel the need to keep working us without rest. I would feel like a a slave if I didn't pay them upwards of 30,000 dollars a year to get my degree. And the fact that I have a car to run away with any time I want and I don't have to run through the woods to get to freedom. Oh and the fact that I'm above the Mason-Dixon line.
That was too much. Sorry.

Well then I crawl up the hill, literally because it's so cold I can't really move properly. I get to my's covered in snow. It's a good thing I have "4 wheel drive" ( I don't know what that means because my car still has crap performance in snow) because I had to traverse the mountains of snow piled up behind my tires. I have no idea how they got there though because no one shovels our parking lot... Anyway I guess the roads weren't that bad it was just the idea that it was so cold that even through my 6 layers of coats and shirts and scarves, my body still went numb. But again, Duquesne could care less about it's student's well being.

Then I had to sit through my liberal ass teacher try to pronounce Japanese words completely wrong, but he said it like he had a legit Japanese accent. He's so full of it I don't know where he fits it all. And he's one of my least favorite teachers because he calls on people. Number one it's 8 in the morning, no one is into Global Sociology and number 2 this is a 100 level class full of freshman, no one did the reading. He thinks his class is the only one that matters. Well next on my list was to print out these papers I wrote last night in five minutes. I went to the lab in the library and nothing came out of the printers because there wasn't any paper. I have no idea how to change the paper and I'm sure it isn't that hard but this particular Wednesday was not the day to learn. So I went to the other computers in the Library and on my first attempt the pages came out double sided which is not acceptable. Then my next attempt was unsuccessful as well as the pages were blank except for one line of Wingdings at the top. So someone came over to fix it and on my third attempt to print it, they came out double sided again. So I went back to the computer and it didn't say anything about being doubles sided. So I said "fuck it" and walked outside in the Arctic tundra to College Hall. I get in there try to print my papers and walk to the printer and there is a lovely sign that says "Printer is not working. Sorry for the inconvenience". yes, you better be. So I had to go back out half way across campus to Towers, which for the first time in years didn't let me down and printed with ease. Then I had to go back to the library and read 50 pages of a book about Frederick Douglass, but I was unsuccessful at that as well.

Not like I participate in class anyway, so no one could tell I didn't figure out if he got to freedom or not (even though I knew he did).

There was a lot more I wanted to rant about. Like replacements, the fact that the same words always seem to appear. And once you notice it once, they continue to show up everywhere you look. And when I say this I mean like at least 15 times a day.

Oh and during my paper writing process tonight, my computer crashed. It loves to do this. I think it's her favorite hobby. She should start charging for that.

Often it is the most deserving people who cannot help loving those who destroy them.
- Hermann Hesse

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