Sunday, April 4, 2010

from Chicago to Cleveland you leave me pain.

if post secret lasted forever, i'd be the happiest person alive.
i'm not sure why i love it so much but when ever little gems like thisit makes my life so much more complete. i'm not saying that holden "saved me" but he is basically my idol in every way.
and i'm sorry cause that's creepy a depressed 16 year old boy is my idol.
i'll never be able to explain it, but minus the whole being in a hospital for his issues, we have a lot of similarities. i'll stop.

i'm trying to make a review game for tomorrow but all i want to do is sit here and do nothing. i know that's my feeling always, but it's really strong right now. i'm not even halfway done but i think i'm going to just finish it tomorrow. i had a semi-hectic weekend. working, Easter, yelling at my family, eating so much candy.

on a heavier note, you know when you really want something, but when you get it (or a version of it) you don't. and when you tell someone something and they don't keep it secret. or when people think it's weird you don't like to talk. or when rejection is on repeat. or when you hate someone but you love them at the same time and you think about them a lot for the last reason. or when your back hurts so badly that you can't wake up? my life is perfect. i can't wait to be just like my cousin who is writing a screen play and builds dog houses in his spare time. all he has is spare time cause he's 24 and jobless. i love this economy.

"i'm going on a date tonight
to try and fall out of love with you.
i know, i know this is a crime
but i don't know what else to do"

here's "The Sweetest Thing" off Camera Obscura's album-aka the anthem to Summer and Fall 09

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